Weep with those who weep--revisited

One of my first posts was about "weeping with those who weep" as in Romans 12. At the time, I still had some unresolved anger/bitterness at people and I'm afraid that post reflected it. I still struggle a little with that, but I'm getting better. This post is about an opportunity to weep with someone who is weeping.
Yesterday, in our homeschool group, I was holding Shannon's baby (from the weepy/psycho post in February). I enjoy holding him, as I always do after I "warm up" to a new baby. I used to warm up as soon as I laid eyes on a baby, but I'm not the same since the miscarriages. It takes awhile. While I was holding him, a lady who lost her newborn son in October walked up to me and asked to hold him. I handed him over and was thinking that she was stronger than I was after I miscarried. A moment later, she said, " I can't do this" and handed him back. I noticed she was crying. She walked out of the room and I gave E to a friend of mine so I could follow her out. My heart broke for her. I hugged her and said, "I couldn't hold a baby for several months after I lost my babies and my babies were very small. I don't know how you did it." She told me that she was able to hold her nieces, but it was something about holding a boy that bothered her. I left her alone and I think she was OK. I got teary eyed talking to her. I remembered the same group, same building a year ago when a lady handed her baby to me and said, "Would you like to hold him?" What was I going to say? I might cry or flip out if I do! No, I just took him and kept choking back the knot in my throat. That was the first baby I held post-Mercy and Blessing. It was also a kind of turning point for me. After that encounter, looking at babies was a little easier and holding them has become easier with each time I've done it.
Last night, when I was thinking it over, I was hoping that she didn't think I was trying to compare my pain to hers. While we both lost babies, what I've experienced is only a taste of the grief she knows. There ARE varied degrees of grieving. I felt them when it came to my own miscarriages. Not that I loved Mercy any more than I loved Blessing, but Mercy was so real to me. My belly started to pooch, I was sick, I had experienced 5 previous healthy pregnancies, so I really thought I'd experience another one. I grieved harder for Mercy than I did for Blessing, but I "knew" Mercy better. I hope she understood that I was only trying to help her. I think she did.
On to another topic. This time of year has always been bittersweet for me. I'm glad to be almost finished with school, but when activities wind down, it makes me feel a little down. My homeschool group is over for the year. It'll start again in August. My kids' PE class ends this Tuesday. I enjoy those 2 days each week because of the friends I see and I'll miss them over the summer (come on, cry with me, Angie). I'm not really crying, but I have been kind of down because of it. When summer comes, I'll wonder how on earth I managed to do school and all of the activities we have during the school year. It's always the same. Summer is never very long and then we'll be back to the old proverbial grindstone for another year. I was like this when I was in school, too. Kind of weird.
Oh, about the pregnant youth from our church. She told her family, who told her they hope she miscarries, not to talk about the baby at all because they don't want to get attached because she's giving it up for adoption (they hope). I was disgusted when I heard their response. First of all, if you don't believe in abortion, why on earth would you wish a baby's death upon this girl? Another thing, if she does give the baby up, these few months will be her only memories of her baby (unless she has an open/semi-open adoption) and talking will help her to remember. Oh, well. It's not my family, so I don't know why I even care!
That's all I have for now.
Later,
Paula