I keep a notebook of prayer requests and quotes or Bible verses I like. I was looking through the one I kept when I lost the last 2 babies and here are a couple of things I wrote at that time.
3/30/05
Dr.'s appt. yesterday--ultrasound didn't show a baby. Req.--go today for a more advanced ultrasound--please let there be an alive, healthy baby!!! I also need peace--I'm a mess.
Later--baby died at about 6 wks. Now I get to wait to miscarry.
"For You will light my lamp, The Lord my God will enlighten my darkness." Psalm 18:28
5/14/05
"If He bids us carry a burden, He carries it also." Charles Spurgeon
6/14/05
"Faith is the deliberate confidence in the character of God whose ways you may not understand at the time." Oswald Chambers
7/17/05
Found out I'm pregnant again today. Nervous, but trying to be excited...
Lord, please let this baby live, & bless us with a healthy, strong baby at the end of 9 months. In Jesus' Name, Amen
8/9/05
Found out again that my baby died. (After this, I wrote out the words to "The Valley Song" by Jars of Clay. I will post them in the future.)
9/27/05
"Now may the God of hope fill you with all joy & peace in believing, that you may abound in hope by the power of the Holy Spirit." Romans 15:13
10/13/05
I feel so alone. Mercy would have been due in 1 1/2 weeks. I've been grieving hard all month thinking about how it should have been--me, big & uncomfortable, timing every pain just waiting to meet my new little one... Then, I think about how it is--aching inside for the little one I won't know in this life; watching so many other women with their big bellies & hearing about their new babies. It's so hard. I swear no one remembers & if they remember, they certainly don't care enough to let me know that they do. Such a large burden to bear alone... I feel like my life has stopped & like I'll never feel happy again. I want a baby so bad & I just don't know if that'll ever happen again. If I never have another baby, will I always feel so sad and depressed all the time? I wish someone would care enough to ask how I am...
(That was one of the lowest times. I have finally come to a point of feeling happiness again, though it took a LONG time to get there.)
I will never have a baby again. I had a hysterectomy in Jan. 06. We considered adoption, but it is so expensive that it wasn't a viable option for us. I'll write more about that another time.
Paula
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
10 comments:
Paula....that could have been my journal you were reading from. The scripture verses were good. Thanks for sharing them. :)
I do not know you but thank you so much for sharing those verses. I suffered a miscarriage 5 weeks ago and they touched me greatly.
I recently found out that I miscarried...we weren't even planning on a baby but were so excited to find out we were pregnant. I am having a terrible time trusting the Lord after the loss of our baby...thank you for sharing your story. It meant a lot to me.
Please know that God loves you and has always been there. He will never leave you or forsake you. Cling to Him at this time, because it is when you need Him most. Pray, even if there are no words. He will reveal Himself to you. He will find ways to comfort you if you just rest in Him. He loves you. He is hurting, too. He cries along with you. I know too well. I lost two- 10/21/08 and 9/8/09. I am still hurting, but trusting.
i have a very similar story at the age of 42 found out i was pregnant and lost the baby at 9 to 10 wks . 2 wks after i lost my baby the consultant told me i had to have a hysterectomy never another chance for me but take great delight in my godsons xx
i have a very similar story at the age of 42 found out i was pregnant and lost the baby at 9 to 10 wks . 2 wks after i lost my baby the consultant told me i had to have a hysterectomy never another chance for me but take great delight in my godsons xx
I recently had a miscarriage of an unplanned pregnancy. I don't know how to cope and work in a baby store where I have to do registries for pregnant women, and a coworker announced she is pregnant an due 2 weeks after I would've been... I don't know how to cope, but your story has helped me some, thank you for sharing
had miscarriage 4 days ago, still bleeding and it bit of pain. i was 10 weeks and had slight bleeding and my husband took me to hospital doc done scan said baby only measuring 6 weeks and he couldn't hear a heartbeat made appiontment to come back in a week and sent me home. i was back few hours later and had miscarried my baby. it would have been our 1st and were so happy. also just foung out the night before my friend was due 3 weeks before us, will be hard watching her week by week as her bump grows. really trusting in God for strength to deal with this.
This incident proved to beeven more popular than both of the schools P. The owner gaveme a funny stair but didnt say a word.
family porn stories
ex bdsm gay interracial stories
sexy stories to tell your boyfriend
free taboo sex stories
erotic first time stories
This incident proved to beeven more popular than both of the schools P. The owner gaveme a funny stair but didnt say a word.
The site of an empty ultrasound screen is harrowing, I have seen it twice. It is not yet the end of the road for me, but I dare not hope. A year of tests after two years of pregnancy loss and I'm no closer. Thank you for the psalm. A.
Post a Comment